From Procrastination to/Product to Purpose
I’ve been given the unique opportunity to view life from a variety of perspectives. I went to a predominantly white high school during the rise of “multiculturalism” in the late 1990’s, then attended a historically black college shortly after in the early 2000’s. Wherever I was, I never seemed to belong.
The High School Years
I distinctly remember thinking about college on my first day of high school, even though I was only 13 years-old. At the time, I planned to only apply to one college - UCLA. That’s where my mom went, so of course I want to be a Bruin. However, that slowly began to change as the years went on.
My good memories of high school definitely outweigh the bad, but English class during Freshman year stands out as one of the few negative. We were assigned “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn” to read as a class, and I hated every minute of it. As the only young black girl in the class, imagine my discomfort when hearing the word “nigger” read out loud and having your classmates turn to you each time to watch your reaction. As a 13 year-old, I was unable to comprehend why that word was in the book, let alone why my classmates were continuing to say it. I couldn’t understand why my teacher didn’t take a moment to not only address the meaning behind it, but also instruct the class to refrain from using such a historically hurtful word. I had nothing against my 9th grade teacher, in fact, all the girls (including myself) had a crush on Mr. Hall, but come on!
Toward the end of high school I began to think that it might be nice to experience a completely different learning environment than the predominantly white high school I had been attending. I imagined what it might be like to attend a school that included people who looked like me, who could relate to my hair struggles, and who knew what the word “ashy” meant. After researching historically black colleges (HBCU) for about a year and a half, I decided to attend Talladega College, a historically black college in Alabama.
Photo by Honey Yanibel Minaya Cruz on Unsplash
The College Years
In 2003, this California girl stepped off the plane in Birmingham, Alabama and was in complete culture shock. From the southern hospitality, to addressing authority with “yes ma'am” or “no sir” (who knew this was a thing?), I was definitely out of my element. There was even a brief period when I was considered rude because I wasn’t properly addressing authority figures as “sir” or “ma'am”. It was clear that I had to learn quickly, but I refused to let that impede on my black college experience.
And then I began to hear the statement, “she talks like a white girl” in reference to how I spoke. It took a moment for the dots to connect, but I finally began to realize what was happening. Until that moment I didn’t know it was possible to “speak” in color. I had always been under the impression that when I opened my mouth to talk I was just talking, not speaking “white” or “black”. I thought I spoke like someone who received a good education.
Then it finally hit me - it was happening all over again. Only this time the people pointing out my differences looked like me. I thought maybe this time around it would be different, but it wasn’t. I won’t even go into my experience outside of the black college in the southern white community down at the Piggly Wiggly’s… that’s a story for a different day.
Photo by Ben Kolde on Unsplash
From Procrastination to Product
Many years after graduating college, I created The Caffeinated Cork Instagram account as a way to tap into my creative energy while working in corporate America. I was in a fun environment, but the job was killing me slowly. What started as an Instagram page dedicated to reposting gorgeous images of coffee and wine to cure my work boredom began to evolve into a shop of coffee and wine statement tees with random statements on them (something I was notorious for coming up with.) I started taking my side gig a little more seriously with every shirt I sold.
From Product to Purpose
After dying a slow death in corporate America and eventually being let go, I was ready to explore the next phase of entrepreneurship with The Caffeinated Cork. Fall of 2018 I launched an event series called, “The Women’s Collective” which aims to connect women through thought provoking and empowering conversations over coffee. I went from creating a statement tee to creating a statement. The purpose of the event series is to acknowledge the difference as a culture by embracing it, just like I’ve done my entire life. By never feeling like I belonged in high school or college, I’m better able to see our differences in a unique way. I’m now creating a space for honest conversations around those differences to help make positive change.
Photo by Irene Kredenets on Unsplash
The only way to come to a full acceptance and understanding of yourself is to embrace your own culture, quirks and differences while learning about those around you and exploring, incorporating and embracing their cultures, differences, quirks, etcetera.